LISTED


11. Toilet
You could be a fireman, a superhero, a cowboy, a rock star, an astronaut, a hobo, a ghost, a monster, a caveman, a ninja, a werewolf, a vampire, a bunny rabbit, a solider, a doctor, Abe Lincoln, or any one of 18,000 characters from popular culture — if the costume shop is sold out of all those, only then is ‘human waste receptacle’ a fallback option.
10. Inflatable Suit
Though “Missy Elliot in the ‘Rain’ music video” is a clever retro costume, we doubt that’s what the designers had in mind.
09. Angry Birds
When selecting a Halloween costume make sure to pick something that can actually fit through your front door.
08. “Rocker Pants”
Their name, not ours. No man has ever come close to “rocking” in spotted pajama bottoms.
07. Sexy Slice of Watermelon
We’ve definitely reached the nadir of sexy Halloween costumes. Is watermelon even the sexiest fruit? Where are all the sexy kumquats?
06. Teddy Roosevelt
If by some astonishing chance you attend a Halloween party full of American history students, this Theodore Roosevelt costume is a fine enough choice. Otherwise, have fun explaining for the 80th time that you’re not actually Colonel Sanders on safari.
05. Guy From LMFAO
LMFAO recently went on hiatus, meaning even they got sick of dressing like themselves.
04. Boob
If getting molested by anyone who is not a woman is your idea of Halloween mirth, then yes, hit the town shaped like a gigantic tit.
03. “Characters”
Are these even costumes? Or is “lazy hipster jerk-off” now a character unto itself?
02. Coroner
A.k.a. a black cotton jumpsuit with the word “coroner” stitched on. Retails for $49.99.
01. Inflatable Doll Man
The single scariest Halloween costume ever devised. Forget turning off the lights and pretending you’re not home — just stand on your porch in this thing and no child will ever bother you again.
Related >> Awful Halloween Costumes 2010
Related >> Awful Halloween Costumes 2011
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